×
×

psychedelics and suicide

I am going to be honest here, I have taken psychedelics many times and it can be pretty common for the 'spirits' or 'neighbours' (entities that appear conscious and transcendental) can arise and tell you audibly or telepathically to 'kill yourself' to 'commit suicide' to 'just go and die already'. The intent here is often confusing, or I should say, at least for me, was confusing. Ever seen the KYS meme? I've seen 'devout' 'straight-edge' Christians use this meme and think it's funny. And it is kind of similar here. The spirits do not have the same way of distinguishing between 'literal' and 'figurative'. Similarly, they do not have the same way of distinguishing between 'good' and 'bad'. To them, that which happens is all good. To them, a statement is intended to represent truth. So when they tell you to kill yourself (which they likely will if you trip enough times in enough ways) they mean it like the meme, they mean it like "kill the parts of yourself that you do not like" or "change the areas of yourself that do not benefit the greater whole", they mean it like "kill your ego" and "learn to take a joke, don't always be so serious." The first 100 or so times it happened I was depressed and considering the following quote by Albert Camus: "There is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide. Judging whether life is or is not worth living amounts to answering the fundamental question of philosophy. All the rest -- whether or not the world has three dimensions, whether the mind has nine or twelve categories -- comes afterward. These are games; one must first answer." All it took was one more time for them to say it and, perhaps by mere chance, at the same time everyone around me who were in a different state-of-mind all started laughing. That was when I realised I had been misinterpreting the situation entirely. I should have been laughing too. The day it happened I relaxed immensely. My housemate told me that morning that he had a dream about me last night, that my room was immaculate and that I was moving out, that I had "got my shit together" and was off to do something important. That was when I realised that someone else's dreams can speak to me profoundly. I knew that dream could be taken as a reference to my newfound insight. Since then, the spirits have told me to kill myself and immediately I telepathically respond "haha, go fuck yourself" or "yea, I'm working on it, give me a break" or "got anything interesting to say?" These spirits, although they appear to transcend physicality, are often childish and ridiculous. They are not to always be taken seriously or respected as higher beings. Treat them like you would yourself, a negligible singular amongst the near-countless many. I had a friend kill themselves whilst on shrooms. He did a backflip off of a bridge after walking for 45 minutes to get there. He clearly had enough time to think about what he was doing, it makes no sense to consider it a once-off rash drug-induced thought. But the kid was a reckless teenager going through depression who would vandalise regularly and skip class even more. Perhaps it was a misinterpretation of the spirits telling him to do it. Perhaps it was a misinterpretation of this world as a whole. A friend told me that he was probably really just thinking "eh, fuck this", mostly in regards to corporate slavery. And, of course, all the squares think it was the shrooms. I once did the same walk a few years later, a kind of unplanned pilgrimage, and it stuck out to me that the only other road along the way is a short 'lane' that shared his name and went under a bridge just the same. When I got to the spot he flipped from I looked over the railing and there was a ship passing through underneath and when ships go through the bridge is closed from traffic so I was gifted by the universe a moment alone with Peter Pan, the lost boy. That day, I changed my name to reflect his, a name that I had asked my parents to call me when I was 4, 12 years before meeting Peter Pan. My parents said I could when I'm older, so instead I named a plush toy with it. I lost that toy and named the next one the same. I lost that toy also and named the next one the same. Around the time of Peter Pan's death, I found all three toys. The night before I did the pilgrimage, I was staying at a friends house on one side of the river, I lived on the other side. I had bogged my car in the middle of the night after having bugger-all marijuana about 4 hours earlier. The cops escorted me home after taking my blood - causing me to lose my driver's licence for a year - having no car and needing to get my wallet from my mates house resulted in the unplanned trip over the bridge. Half the journey across I was 'hearing voices' that where people in nearby houses praying for random things directly into my mind, half the prayers cancelled out with the other half moments later (ie. "please God, make it rain more" and "please God, make it rain less"), so I felt no need to mentally respond to the voices with anything other than "quit being selfish", and they immediately ceased.

Viewcount: 214
Post viewcount: 22274 Views

abstracting metaphor

Viewcount: 253

a letter to a consciousness

Viewcount: 445

a letter to a nihilist

Viewcount: 307

a letter to a politician

Viewcount: 230

a letter to a square

Viewcount: 252

any years resolution

Viewcount: 384

axioms empty set

Viewcount: 251

Beliefs be leaves on a tree

Viewcount: 546

building sandcastles

Viewcount: 238

case reports

Viewcount: 249

cleaning up after priors

Viewcount: 211

cognitive fallacies

Viewcount: 247

creating morality

Viewcount: 243

dear god

Viewcount: 238

escaping from reality

Viewcount: 228

ever present metaphors

Viewcount: 236

every story as a story

Viewcount: 242

explore the body

Viewcount: 256

freedom as a negative concept

Viewcount: 207

front

Viewcount: 224

future human sex

Viewcount: 315

gnosis

Viewcount: 392

god a non npc

Viewcount: 580

having the drug talk

Viewcount: 279

her

Viewcount: 243

hermeneutics - interpretation

Viewcount: 249

hitchen's razor

Viewcount: 625

how can i learn more about psychoactive drugs

Viewcount: 217

how does good

Viewcount: 329

how i meditate where it gets me

Viewcount: 231

how psychedelic wake

Viewcount: 337

humorism

Viewcount: 211

hypotheticals

Viewcount: 223

if singularity, then end of the world

Viewcount: 227

incompatibility

Viewcount: 204

Internet of babel

Viewcount: 212

In The Beginning

Viewcount: 270

is it wrong to think the wrong thing

Viewcount: 192

line

Viewcount: 269

mental guises

Viewcount: 205

mental hospital

Viewcount: 200

miraculous is magic

Viewcount: 228

muhammad

Viewcount: 253

my first trip

Viewcount: 328

my second trip

Viewcount: 239

occam's gear

Viewcount: 235

on existence of equality

Viewcount: 181

other

Viewcount: 209

Out of context

Viewcount: 197

oversimplification

Viewcount: 242

perhaps rest in peace is wrong

Viewcount: 191

podcast reviews

Viewcount: 350

projection bias

Viewcount: 310

proverbs are i told you so's

Viewcount: 295

psychedelics and suicide

Viewcount: 214

purposeful misreading

Viewcount: 206

p vs np

Viewcount: 420

questions about a trip

Viewcount: 277

quotes of the aether

Viewcount: 207

reactionary mindfulness

Viewcount: 202

responsibilities for parents

Viewcount: 218

skeptic

Viewcount: 352

suicide preventiono

Viewcount: 224

tachyons

Viewcount: 221

taking a step back

Viewcount: 195

tautology as magic

Viewcount: 215

the anything innate difference

Viewcount: 232

the house of want

Viewcount: 221

the limit of outside the box thinking

Viewcount: 208

the meaning of life

Viewcount: 231

-- the synthing

Viewcount: 218

the system is rigged

Viewcount: 211

thought police

Viewcount: 292

to make a parody of yourself

Viewcount: 231

to say

Viewcount: 229

trickledown economics

Viewcount: 202

trip 3

Viewcount: 190

trip 4

Viewcount: 222

tying up loose ends

Viewcount: 342

ultimately containing complete greediness

Viewcount: 205

What is meaning? Every word could mean anything if said on it's own, in particular: sex.

Viewcount: 201

what is the meaning of life

Viewcount: 212

who am i

Viewcount: 238

why psychedelic wake

Viewcount: 214

woo woo

Viewcount: 213

you're not going to notice it

Viewcount: 256