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a letter to a consciousness

A Letter To A Consciousness You do not own me. Unless you prove to own me, in which case I will submit. This is for a parent, a politician, and any old person. Does the state own my consciousness? Well, technically, I didn't sign anything, but I am being regulated, to the point where I can leave and enter another country at which point I would be regulated by someone else, but there is regulation to oversee that process of emigration. I think of it like there is a gun to my head, that democracy is, just as Moore said, anarchy where the toughest gang already won. But the lions den is empty; there is no rider behind the reins of this horse. Will the horse gallop itself free? Paranoid-schizophrenics are often scared that the law will get them and declare that their body is not their own and that 'the man' can arrest them whenever they have reason to. As it turns out, in Australia, someone who is diagnosed as schizophrenic can be arrested at any time for any reason, even second hand information can be the cause for police to arrest you, whether there is any evidence for anything otherwise out of the ordinary. (I got arrested because my step-brother wouldn't let me leave the house, so I pushed him, he declared violence and notified the police) So yes, not only has everything I was paranoid about, so far, occurred, but I am now being dosed to ensure I cannot function, because otherwise my consciousness would become so emotional that I have flashbacks, visions and hallucinations of spirits reminding me of every chain in the sequence that lead to this occurring. Since I was mis-diagnosed as schizophrenic, I have since gotten so emotional that it developed anyway. WHY WAS I DIAGNOSED IN THE FIRST PLACE Well, once I learned what skepticism was, I became skeptical of religion as well as the law, because the law binds us more than religare (root word for religion meaning 'to bind'). And it seems very natural to be skeptical of that which binds us, as it may result in our freedom. The first thing that makes a scientist is their skepticism, the second is their observation, and the third is documentation, before finally a peer-review. As a studying biotechnology and medical research student, I developed some theories about human consciousness and prepared an experiment, I started smoking weed, as I believed that the N-type calcium channels that are inhibited actually inhibit neural growth, and disinhibiting the potassium channel actually improves neural fire-rates. What this translated to me is that Cannabis would grow my brain and make me think quicker, perhaps if I thought about good things I could quickly grow a good brain. What I found out is that I would think so much quicker that very occasionally I would be so focussed on something else that the task at hand was completed poorly, thus it was quickly noticed that in small doses it meant I was better at school work. When I say better at school work, I already was a straight A student, but now I could get A's and only put in a quarter of the effort. Hell, I even started getting C's and putting in even less effort, because now I'd found Cannabis, I had so much interest in learning about Music and Philosophy and Film. I was doing university for the degree, not to be an OCD perfectionist like my parents seemed to want. That's the other aspect, the inhibition of adenylate cyclase, relaxation / lethargy. Because I was a curious tripper, I read Wikipedia most days, soon enough I learnt that I had a lot of symptoms for bipolar disorder. Because my brother was a doctor, I told him the symptoms and shared my concern so he encouraged me to go the hospital. Once I told them I believed in Prophecy, Speaking in Tongues, Aliens, Pantheism, Magic and Telepathy, they knew that they had a schizophrenic. That and the concept of "disordered thought" is all it took. WHO HAS DISORDERED THOUGHT Well, the doctor was telling me about disordered thought before he was interrupted. He then responded to the other person and returned to our conversation about seeing me at my next appointment. His thought about disordered thought was out of order to me. MENTAL ABILITIES First, I prefer to think of the nervous system as the excitement system, because that orientation is far more important to me. The brain only has so much room for so many excitement cells and their axons, grey matter and white matter respectively. If you dwell on anger, you can guarantee that angry connections are being habituated (grey to white and back to grey). If you dwell on nothing, you can guarantee that connections without much emotional attachment are being habituated. If you read the thesauraus, you practice white matter. If you read the dictionary, you practice grey matter. Locations in the brain are correlated with concepts, so grey matter cells are correlated with concepts, and white matter is correlated to the understanding between them. Someone who understands a lot can 'see' (think through) the connections between a lot of different things, someone who knows a lot can 'see' what a thing needs to have in order to be that thing. But there's only so much space, so over time, the things you need less and less, the memories fall away. However, in the process of re-wiring one's brain through understanding and knowledge, one can attain some pretty extraordinary and hopeless states. But documenting the spirit (which in Hebrew translates back to 'mind') has so far been a hobby of religions. The hyper dimensional vivid imagination and synaesthesia of turning a sound into a feeling or a feeling into knowledge has mostly been left documented by those who have yet to be scientifically inclined. However, there is a process to developing these skills. For example, try observing yourself, every time you repeat a noticeable unit of body language, like scratching your right nostril with your right thumb, try and guess what it means. Stop when your guess matches every time. Then see if it matches with other people in your local environment.

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